Happy Belated Birthday Chuck Bass, err..Ed Westwick!
The hawtest bad boy in the history of television just turned 22 June 27th!...
Ok, so not exactly Chuck Bass (whose fictional birthday is May 19,1991) but for the sake of my craziness and the safety of all involved...lets just pretend.
The hottest.person.in.the.history.of.life. celebrated his shin-dig by bowling (omg.presh) with friends and his vomitgirlfriendvomit Jessica Szohr.Crazy what a year can do to one’s carreer..last year, I totally staked down Ed’s 21st private b-day photos on his and his friends’ myspace profiles... this year? not so much. but mostly cause I have myspace now blocked at work. pretty sure for these exact reasons...
Anyway...Ed and Jessica...Here they are together. I hate her so much cause she's super hot but her hair looks really bad here. heee!:
And look. they're wearing sorta matchy shoes.
And aside from Chuck Bass, who looks perfect always and forever and he can wear a garbage bag as an outfit and I would still drool and give him a gold star (like a for real one, I’d grab from the sky), girlfriend’s clothes could use some… pizzazz, non?
Dear Jessica Szohr, please let me be your stylist. Vanessa has more style than that..and she’s like poor or something, for goodness’ sakes! I am the best, just ask all my ladies..they come shopping in my closet frequently and let me style them and always look top notch! And then we’d become besties and one drunken unsuspecting night, when you’d be away on some indie film shoot, I’d totally seduce the Chuckster and proceed to have his babies…I mean..what?!...
Anywhoooo…moving on, it’s a shame that Chuck Bass never did make it to the MMVA’s last weekend. After all that hard work of scoping out the perfect MO spots in secret doorways and janitor closet at all the after-parties, it was a tad bit disappointing that he was a no-show.
Ah sh*t gotta go…my parole officer’s completely unto me and calling. It must be the monitor bracelet that detects crazy talk…
Happy Belated my sweet, sweet Chuck Bass!